he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
