your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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