I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Come share oat with me in your robe
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
