and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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