I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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