Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
