question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize