FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
