yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
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