Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
