the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
