Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize