Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
porn star boner night. come get it.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize