all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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