Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
