Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
