he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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