I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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