She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
