When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Randomize
