this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
