Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
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