Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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