Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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