she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Randomize
