You're so nebulous sometimes
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
