Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize