is wine microwaveable?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
