Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
