lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I intend to get homeless drunk
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
