i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
