Dual....:-)
i just wanna soil my oats bro
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Randomize
