So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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