btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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