You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
