I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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