I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize