you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
