Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Randomize
