Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
zippers are such a cool invention
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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