It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
