New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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