Non-Jews are for practice
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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