so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
