so that wasnt chicken after all
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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