the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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