I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
We are all done wearing pants today
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