please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
