How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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