One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
someone threw a dead crab at me
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize