Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
