You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
